Where to begin…
Before I tell you all bout the competition, I want to go
back at the core of this blog. I titled the blog about ~3 years ago: “one-last
shot”. So was this really a “one-last shot”. Through the years this blog
underwent a transformation from goal oriented-writing to more of a recount of
an amazing experience. “One-last shot” implied that this was the last time I
was able to do X in order to achieve Y, and that I have had previously a somewhat
failed attempt to achieve Y. In retrospect, I think I truly missed the point by
titling my blog “one-last shot”. My
gymnastics career was not a last attempt at achieving “glory, or making it
internationally”, if that would have been the case I would have stop training
after my elbow dislocation. This experience made me realize that doing
gymnastics was not about achieving a goal. Training and competing gymnastics
gave me the opportunity to understand myself, to fall in love with the sport,
and to challenge my mind and to learn about hard work, passion and desire to
push through the limits. At 27 years old, I now understand gymnastics
better. It is not about the coaches,
about your parents, about winning or loosing, it is about relationships, about
your teammates, about learning and is also about you! Gymnastics gives you an
opportunity to become introspective from an early age, it allows you to learn about
your strengths and weakness, and how these change over-time. When I stopped doing gymnastics at 16, I
couldn't put words to these lessons, I am not sure I really understood them. I
am grateful and I feel privileged to have had the opportunity to be a gymnast
throughout my 20s. My experience was not a “one-last shot” it was an
opportunity to continue growing, to expand on my understanding of myself, to
train my mind to recognize my new strengths and weaknesses in order to be a
better person.
So Nationals…
Walking into the arena with hundreds of other gymnast was an
electrifying experience. On Friday I hit all of my routines winning my session
and qualifying to the finals in 8th place overall, I had made it to
finals!!!.
By the time we began warm up I
found myself ready, ready to give it my all, to take every little moment of the
competition and savored it. It didn't matter that my knee was sore and I
couldn’t warm up properly. My focus was on enjoying this opportunity while
trusting my training of 4 years. I began on bars with a good enough routine.
From there a moved to the beam, I did not fall and connected all of my skills
to score a 9. Warming up floor was not fun, the knee hurt. I spent most of the
warm up wrapping it up rather than tumbling. I did a couple of turns landing on
my back to protect my knee from having to absorb the impact. My floor routine
was not as good as it had been during pre-lims but to me it felt like one of
the bests as it showed me that I could overcome the pain, trust my training and
perform by immersing myself into the music of my routine.
The last event was vault. At this
point walking on the knee felt uncomfortable, running down the runway was not
fun to say the list. I warmed up one vault that I over rotate to land on my
back and protect my knee. The vault sucked but it just gave me the extra
confidence I needed to perform the “one-last vault” (ironic I just spend a
whole paragraph discussing the title of the blog, but I guess in this
situation, it was truly the one-last vault). The coaches from the other teams
asked me if I wanted to go again I said no thank you. I stood on the sidelines
watching the others warm up and all I was thinking about was all of the many
drills and vaults I had done over the past 4 years. I remembered the first time
I attempted a yurchenko vault at a gym in NC. I remembered telling Scott… you see
you can teach an old dog to do new tricks J.
I asked to be the first on vault and so after warm up was over I stood at the
end of the runway.
I know it is a gymnastics cliché
but the image of Kerri Strug during the 1996 Olympics inevitably came to my mind
as I stared at the still vault table. At 9 years-old I didn't truly understand
the amount of mind power one needs to have in order to do what Kerri did. I had
always have respect and admiration for her determination and will power. But
even in times when I had found myself in a similar position and I tried to find
in Kerri inspiration to push through, the pain or the idea of pain always made
me crumble. Even when I thought and I told myself I could do it, I ended up on
the floor. At Virginia Tech in 2010, I crumbled by the idea of landing short
and hurting my ankle that was already in pain and guess what… I did, I landed
short and hurt my foot. At Mexico Nationals in 2011, under the pain of plantar
fasciitis and Achilles tendonitis, I missed to put my hands on the table on a
yurchenko and did a vault that scared everybody in the arena.
But that Saturday at NAIGC felt
different. I looked at the vault table and focused on the perfect yurchenko,
focused on my training instead of the pain or on the idea of getting hurt. I thought
about Kerry and hoped that I had learned the lessons and that today I would do
it; I would show myself that I too was determined and had the will power to
accomplish my goal. I sprint down the runway and landed taking just one step
back. I saluted the judge and looked at my husband and said with a big smile on
my face… I am done!!! I did it!!!
The vault scored a 9.6 placing 2nd
on the competition and giving me the chance to take 10th place in
the AA.
I am proud of this journey; of the up
and downs, of all of the lessons I have learned. I can say that these have been
the best days of my life and I look forward to keep using the skills that
gymnastics has given me to face the rest of my life.
